30 (or USA! USA!)

Invited to watch the sunset and make grilled cheese tonight up in Gringo Hill.
The offer came after drinking two Pilsens at Moon Shiva last night and I was really only excited about the idea of eating grilled cheese.

But the sunset will be okay, too. Like, real okay.

Oh, the staples of my US diet. I had a spoonful of peanut butter a couple weeks ago and it felt like heaven. Part of me wonders if I'll still like sushi, or ethiopian, or indian. What about mac and cheese? What will my first meal be when I get back home? So many foods I haven't eaten (and so many food I will be unable to eat after I get back).

I will wake up that first morning home and panic.

But here I wake up at 5am and my mind fills with "to-dos" for my return. Dentist, haircut, shopping, trashing. I will have more options for breakfast, more options than the handful of shirts and couple of dresses and trying to swing an outfit with the sole pair of Levi jeans that now have more than half a dozen holes in inappropriate places. And the vans, the poor vans.

Purge purge purge. I will have TOO MUCH STUFF.

I'm excited about the getting rid of lots of things. But the disposal must be swift and quick, before I have a chance to get nostalgic over everything. Luckily there's a Baltimore clothing swap within the week of my return. Before I left the States my dad and I went through most of the closets and the basement and had about three full carloads of things to take to Salvation Army. I can't wait to get back and get rid of all the (relatively) stupid things I've held onto for years and years and years that take up space. All I want in my room are my records, my books, some clothes, and a bed. And I'll have a sweet new computer, which is pretty cool, too.

Simple simple simple. Its not something that has to only exist on the road.

Yesterday I played an indoor soccer game and got all bruised up but it felt so good to run. Soccer over study groups.

Exams are over, I picked my classes, I have a room, and things are coming to an end. Now it's just the final push for research papers and presentations. The symposiums are Monday and Tuesday, so today I need to buckle down and finish this methods paper. TODAY. RIGHT NOW. SELF, I MEAN IT.

So everyday my feelings are up in the air. Monday I obviously was on the downside of leaving. Today I'm excited to return. Tonight I may feel different. Tomorrow, who knows? I just feel GREAT.

And that's how it should be.